Tag Archives: Personal update

TOO SICK TO LAUGH

As I am down with the flu, I wanted to  trying the laugh cure.  Was going to watch some Seinfeld reruns.

GRANNY KAT joke

Didn’t have the gumption even to watch turn on the TV. Wish my doctor’s hand writing was illegible. Better yet wish there was a cure for this bug. Will let you know when I swat it down and am strong again.  Until then this is the best I can to.  This and sleep.

ALL THE USUAL STUFF ABOUT STAYING STRONG

Here is my thank you gift if you have just started following me.   It is a free guide to the Daily Twelve Emotional Fitness Exercises. These are easy to learn, easy to practice and helpful to anyone dealing with life’s stresses and every day problems.

My book  Parents Are People Too: An Emotional Fitness Program for parents details all the exercises needed to get and stay emotionally strong.  All my other  books can be found on my  Amazon’s Author Page.

You can also follow me on the When Good Kids Do Bad Things Facebook page. If you go there please take a moment to like it.

Finally, You might find my Emotional Fitness Training’s Pinterest site helpful. Both of my blog posts are pinned there, and I also share peoples information that I think for help you stay strong both as a parent and an individual. Take a peek by clicking here.

As I tell myself a thousand times a day,  do not weaken, give lots of love to others and to yourself, be grateful, practice kindness, live now, give and seek forgiveness, and always hope  the blessing of the forces beyond our control are with you and those you love.

Katherine

TAKE TIME FOR YOU

SOME WISDOM FROM THE SAGES:

Take rest; a field that has rested gives a bountiful crop.  Ovid

Whether on the week end or throughout the week, everyone of us needs not just a room of our own as Virginia Wolfe claimed, but time alone.  That time needs to be just for us, no demands, nothing to do but what pleases us.

I picked this picture because I often found time for me at the beach.  True, the kids might be there, but often Dad had taken them off for a long walk. I would mostly just be sitting, but I also might be swimming.  At the busiest times in my parenting life, my Me\Time was often in the adult lanes of a swimming pool.

What matters most is that the time is for you and whether it is ten minutes, an hour, an evening. or a day it is yours and you must claim it. To do that you must control you Monkey Mind, meaning keep all must do  busy thoughts or worries  at bay.  That takes some practice, but can be done.  Even something as simple as recognizing your mind is rushing around, taking a long slow breathe in, thinking some calming words while you breathe out helps.  Moroever, the more you practice that, the more you can chase the monkey of negative thoughts away.  Another tip, as you breathe out, smile a bit and say “Thank you.” A final tip, many find quietly singing a song that calms them, works to help you claim your “Me time.”

AS ALWAYS PRACTICE KINDNESS

Be kind to  me,  like this post or share it.  You will be helping me stay strong and maybe some others as well.  You will also be practicing one of the 12 Daily Emotional Fitness Exercises.  Click here to view all Daily Emotional Fitness  Exercises.

If  regular practice of the 12 Daily Emotional Fitness Exercises does not improve  the quality of your life, more might be needed.  That is the time to think about therapy.

IMAGE BY: Free digital photos


Parents Need a Day of Rest

A QUOTE FOR THINKING ABOUT WHAT MATTERS

Take rest; a field that has rested gives a bountiful crop.  Ovid

A STAYING STRONG TIP: My weekend and days of rest are fast approaching.   No matter what your beliefs about a higher power, a day devoted to a simpler life is strengthening.  To me that means thinking about what matters, not spending money, not working on any  commercial ventures,  not using my beloved computer, turning off the cell phone,  connecting with friends, nature, my G-d.

Create your own version, your life will improve. Set aside one day a week for no (or minimal) travel, no turning on the tv, radio, or computer,  turning off your cell phone. going only where you can walk.  Try it you might like it.  And yes, that might be a bit extreme, so adjust it to your and your family’s comfort zone.

The earlier you start these ‘taking a break’ family times and then each alone time strategies the better. Teenagers are harder to woo into such times.  A game night once a month might be all you can manage.  Still it will make a difference.

And yes, one of my ongoing cranks is how much harder it is on today’s parents to do these things.  David and I were both at home and it was hard enough, but during those years parenting was our only job.  So if you are working at more than being a parent, more then ever you will need some some unconnected family time and the same for your children.  you.  Start small and spread.  It is my dream every family will teach their children the lesson of boredom.  That lesson?  Learning to fend for yourself when it comes to how you spend your time.  Some creative ideas blossom during times of little one must do.

I have rushed to get this post up, so forgive any errors.  Peace be yours.

IMAGE BY ME: Wild flowers in a field allowed to rest.

Parents Need a Day of Rest


May you walk in peace and may the light of love shine in and through you, now and forever.

A QUOTE FOR THINKING ABOUT WHAT MATTERSTake rest; a field that has rested gives a bountiful crop.  Ovid

A STAYING STRONG TIP: For those new to this blog, I am a Jew.  I converted after my marriage.  Observing the Shabbat has been a major blessing becoming a Jew bestowed on me.  Each Friday, I will be posting a Shabbat Shalom message and urging all parents to schedule a day of rest or at least some regular hours of rest. No matter what your beliefs about a higher power, a day devoted to a simpler life is strengthening.  To me that means thinking about what matters, not spending money, not working on any  commercial ventures,  not using my beloved computer, turning off the cell phone,  connecting with friends, nature, my G-d.

Create your own version, your life will improve.

STAYING STRONG TIP ADDED VALUE:   Set aside one day a week for no (or minimal) travel, and no turning on the tv, radio, or computer and turning off your cell phone.  It saves gas, reduces your carbon footprint, might solve the energy crisis, stop the heating up of our planet. Try it you might like it.

If your life does not include a day of rest, think about instituting at least some hours of rest from the busy electronic life.  Do something with the family–a game night is a good way to start. Another possibility: a reading time where part of a novel gets read each night . When we were foster parents sitting down for dinner with no tv and no telephone  was mandatory five nights a week.   You didn’t have to eat, you didn’t have to talk, you had to be there, and be moderately polite.  One night was joke night, another our Shabbot.  Those were the only two with any structure.  We also had a family night out. Usually a fast food meal and a movie, but it could be bowling, ice-skating, a more special treat. We also had a get your own dinner night.  Finally, each parent had a designated weekly night out.

A final way we tried to get time for ourselves was a manditory quiet and in your room bed time.  Leave your room, make noise, or  call our names and, if  you were not  bleeding you were punished.  Most of our foster kids had sleep problems so watching tv–yes, each room had a small tv (no cable in those days) –listening to the radio or reading was allowed, but quiet had to prevail.

Most experts on staying healthy say keep the television out of the bedroom. We do now, but did not when we were foster parents. It was our nightly laugh time.  I credit Johnnie Carson’s monologues with keeping us sane.  Now I take out my hearing aid. David listens to the radio and I read or do puzzles.

The earlier you start these ‘taking a break’ strategies the better. Teenagers are harder to woo into such times.  A movie once a month may be the best you can manage.  Still it will make a difference.  When I ran the mental health crisis teams we had a Family Fun night every week.  A snack type dinner, games, group talk.  It was one of the things that got teens to spend time with their parents and siblings. It relieved the parents from the stress of cooking dinner.  It was also one of the things most parents said was most helpful.

And yes, one of my ongoing cranks is how much harder it is on today’s parents to do these things.  David and I were both at home and it was hard enough, but it was during those years our only job.  So if you are working at more than being a parent, don’t guilt yourself if you can’t do as we did.  Do try to find some unconnected family time and the same for you.  Start small and spread.  Also if you have found ideas that get your family unconnected and spending quiet or play time together then share.  Also share if you’ve found a way to carve out some of the same for just you.

PERSONAL UPDATE:  Back safely from road trip to see our East Coast son and grandson. Joy of the visit much reduced because grandson came down with a strep throat and high fever and did not join us. Joy that our son came.  Some good times in the sun and sand.  Punky the Pup, our newest family member,  survived becoming a Roadie. We managed to find a few places where he could be set free to run, run, run, run.  He loves such times and alway has to be tricked to get back in the car or get a leash on.

The wonderful thing about dogs is they love you even when they don’t like what you do and may growl with displeasure or fight a rule and just a few minutes later their tails are wagging. The younger the child, the more they are able to be angry one minute and loving the next. How sad all the joy and the love our young know gets eroded by life.

I have almost unpacked everything and am getting ready for a much needed Shabbot. The Colorado grands will be visiting tomorrow.

My book When Good Kids Do Bad Things will soon hit the electronic air waves.    And that is why I have revived my Parents Friend Blog. If you are or you know parents who want to see how others handle raising kids into today’s world as well as to share what works or worked for you, please subscribe to The Parent’s Friend.

I have rushed to get this post up, so forgive any errors.  Peace be yours.

IMAGE BY: adinadesigns.com