Tag Archives: family fun

BE A FAMILY MEETING FAMILY

An edited re-blog. I remain on holiday schedule; I also know many of your might have missed this one; family meetings are an important parenting tool.

family-meeting-in-kitchen

The image is from the She Knows Blog  and comes with the following paragraphs:

You can lose sight of overarching goals if you don’t remind yourself of them regularly. By setting a regular family meeting, you’ll be able to get everyone together to talk about upcoming activities and events and to evaluate them in relation to the family goals.

Family meetings work best when they have a clear agenda. Prioritizing and planning activities should be a consistent agenda item,” says Dr. John Duffy, a clinical psychologist and author of The Available Parent: Radical Optimism for Raising Teens and Tweens. The more involvement and buy-in you have from your kids, the more success you’ll experience as a family.

You are, whether you know it or not, a family meeting family; every family is.  A meeting is any get together involving two people and at least one with an agenda.  Putting your three-year old to bed? That is a meeting.  When you share the same agenda all is more likely to go.  As most parents know agendas are not always shared. When agenda’s differ at the end of these little every day meetings one person feels, while  two or three people don’t.

That is called life.  You cannot please everyone all the time.  As was heard in the baseball movie, Bull Durham, “Some days you win, some days you lose and some days it rains.”  The trick is to accept bad feelings and stay in the game doing your best. Happens to every family member, every day; happens in most family meetings as well as other everyday meetings also.

The little meetings go lots better if the family meets regularly as a team to handle business and does so successfully.  Such meetings reduce parental  stress.  Moreover, such meetings prepare you and your children for handling life’s other meetings, but most importantly teach many important life lessons, including how to deal with not getting you way as well as strategies for getting your way.

Parenting Advice for conducting successful family meetings

Tip one:   Family meetings are a potent and powerful tool for parents, but only if successful and that is not always easily accomplished.  Here are the success tips I developed. Many are drawn from the business world.  Parents are leaders, managers, CEOs; the successful in that group I dub Power Leaders and I have learned much from them.

FMtip sheet

Tip two: The best place to start if you have not been holding regular family meetings is to start with some Family Fun Meetings.   Here is one idea:  have a craft event that re-cycle’s the end of the year greeting cards in one of three ways:  Make gift tags for next year by cutting parts of the cards, punching a hole for the tie.  Have each family member make a scrap-book page out of some of the cards.  Have each family member contribute to a Memory collage that to be or put in a Family Memories Scrap book.

Tip Three: For more tips my  How To Hold Successful Family Meetings is now available in print.

1481187317

If you buy it, please share a review.  And yes, there are lots of other resources about family meetings on the web, some free.  I think mine combines the best of knowledge from clinical and business gurus, but also in-the-trench parents including the many  wonderful parent advocates I worked with.  You know who you are. Thank you all.

STAY STRONG

If you do not hold regular family meetings, make doing so one of your New Years Resolution.  Even one family fun event meeting a month, with a bit of business is better than none.

THE USUAL STAYING STRONG HELP

First, here is my thank you gift if you have just started following me.   It is a free guide to the Daily Twelve Emotional Fitness Exercises. These are easy to learn, easy to practice and helpful to anyone dealing with life’s stresses and every day problems.

My book  Parents Are People Too: An Emotional Fitness Program for parents details all the exercises needed to get and stay emotionally strong.  All my other  books can be found on my  Amazon’s Author Page.

You can also follow me on the When Good Kids Do Bad Things Facebook page. If you go there please take a moment to like it.

Finally, You might find my Emotional Fitness Training’s Pinterest site helpful. Both of my blog posts are pinned there, and I also share people’s information that I think for help you stay strong both as a parent and an individual. Take a peek by clicking here.

As I tell myself a thousand times a day,  do not weaken, give lots of love to others and to yourself, be grateful, practice kindness, live now, give and seek forgiveness, and always hope  the blessing of the forces beyond our control are with you and those you love.

Katherine

DISCLAIMER: FORGIVE MY GRAMMATICAL ERRORS FOR I HAVE DYSGRAPHIA.  If you need perfect posts, you will not find them here. I have dysgraphia which means that sometimes my sentence structure is not that easy to follow or I make other errors. Still, most people understand me. All of my books are professionally edited, but not all of my blog posts are.  If this troubles you, feel free to read elsewhere.  If you persevere, you are practicing kindness by lifting my spirits for that means you find what I say helpful and that is one of my missions. Kindness always repays those who spread it.

ARE YOU A CRAFTY FAMILY?

This posts continues my efforts to urge parents to hold formal family meetings.  The best way to start is by instituting a family craft or game night.

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Remember, a meeting is any get together involving two people and at least one with an agenda.  One adult wanting some fun time with one child is a meeting, but an informal one.  Announcing the meeting ahead of time, or making it a regularly scheduled meeting turns informal meetings into formal meetings.

One of my fondest memories is being taught to play various card games by my father on our very rare family vacations.  I must have been six or seven when he started including me.

PARENTING ADVICE ABOUT CRAFTS AND GAMES

Tip one: Playing games with a child starts with Patty-Cake or Inkie-Dinkie Spider.  We take our three and one year old grandchildren to the local Y and onto the Racket Ball Court.  They chase balls, we use the rackets and a great time is had by all.  Lots of games can be dumbed down and played with the pre-school set.  Doing so lays the foundation for future games.

Tip two: Use handicapping to level the playing field.  How?  Playing soccer – adults have to walk, or only hit the ball with their heads.  Playing chess with a beginner – he gets all his pieces you play with minus enough pieces to give him a chance to win.

Tip three: Games are for fun and it is how you play the game that matters – not if you win.

Tip four: My Pinterest board Family Fun and Fun for One is full of other people’s pins and ideas for family crafts.

STAY STRONG

Family meetings are a major tool for helping all in a family stay strong.  Making fun events part of each meeting enhances the power of such meetings.

Emotional Fitness Exercises are another way to stay strong, so, here is my thank you gift if you have just started following me.   It is a free guide to the Daily Twelve Emotional Fitness Exercises. These are easy to learn, easy to practice and helpful to anyone dealing with life’s stresses and every day problems.

As I tell myself a thousand times a day,  stay strong, never weaken, give lots of love to others and to yourself, be grateful, practice kindness, live now, give and seek forgiveness, and always hope  the blessing of the forces beyond our control are with you and those you love.

Katherine

Here is my thank you gift for those joining me for the first time.  Click here to be taken to an introduction to the Daily Twelve Emotional Fitness Exercises.  Practicing kindness is one.

Katherine

THE USUAL PROMOTIONAL STUFF

Liking, commenting, sharing are acts of social media kindness and very easy to practice.  So be kind to me and all your media friends. I promise you will be repaid.

Visit me at any of these sites

ABOUT MY BOOKS

All my books are available  at Katherine Gordy Levine on Amazon.

Get my newest book which is in print, by clicking  How To Hold Successful Family Meetings

GRAB A FREE COPY OF MY E-BOOK WHEN GOOD KIDS GET YOU IN A GOTCHA WAR

DISCLAIMER ONE: EMOTIONAL FITNESS TRAINING IS NOT THERAPY Even the most learned researchers and therapists quarrel about much.  Take their advice and mine carefully.  Don’t just listen to your heart, but also think; don’t just think, listen to your heart.  Heart and head working together increase the odds you will find useful advice amid all the promises and hopes pushed at you be others.  As others have noted, take what seems useful, leave the rest.

DISCLAIMER TWO: FORGIVE MY GRAMMATICAL ERRORS If  you need perfect posts, you will not find them  here;  I will understand if you don’t follow, like or share what  like me.  Not only am I dealing with an aging brain, but all of my life I have been plagued by dysgraphia–a learning disability,  Some of my posts might be peppered with bad spelling, poor punctuation, and worse words that make no sense.  If  you want to hang in with me, thank you; you are kind. If a post doesn’t make sense or bugs you too much, try reading it a few days later.  Often I catch the worse mistakes when I read the post after a few days.

FAMILY DREAM VACATION

Continuing my efforts to urge parents to hold formal family meetings.  The best way to start is with some family fun meetings such as planning the Family Dream Vacation

Remember, a meeting is any get together involving two people and at least one with an agenda.  One adult wanting some fun time with one child is a meeting, but an informal one.  Announcing the meeting ahead of time turns informal meetings into formal meetings.  The announcement can be made an hour ahead of the meeting or days ahead.

PARENTING ADVICE

Most of you have some sort of family fun event for New Year’s Eve.  If not, you may want to start with a Family Dream Vacation Exercise.  (Thank you friend Pamela Smithbell for this idea.

Dreaming Exercises are useful for getting  family member to talk about hopes.  However, such exercises should not stop there. Dreams are castles in the air and the dreamers have to build a stairway up to the dream.  Doing so requires turning a dream into an attainable goal.

Denis Waitley author and chairman of psychology for the U.S. Olympic Committee’s Sports Medicine Council noted:  “The reason most people don’t reach their goals is that they don’t define them, learn about them, or even seriously consider them as believable or achievable. Winners can tell you where they are going, what they plan to do along the way, and who will be sharing the adventure with them.”

Family meetings can teach all how to use the SMART goal process in efforts to turn dreams into realities.  SMART GOALS are Specific, measurable, action oriented, realistic, and time framed. Here is how that would be applied to planning a family vacation:

S = Specfic = Not “We want to have a great time,” but “We want to go where the sun shines on an ocean beach, people speak our language, the temperature doesn’t dip below 70 degrees and  there are several family fun activities, Mom doesn’t want to have to cook and Dad wants to play a bit of golf.

M = Measurable = Almost everything cited above is measurable.  Even “fun” can be measured by using a rating scale of  1 is no fun; 10 the best fun of my life.

A = Action based = This involves listing all the steps needed to reach your goal.  Family Vacation Planning: doing so starts with the dream, then figuring where all the family dreams will best be met, then investigating costs and out how much will be needed and how far the family budget will stretch, revising dreams to fit the budget, and then making the concrete plans for the vacation.

R = Realistic = If the nearest warm beach is half a continent away and air fare is $499 round trip per person and your family is already having trouble paying the mortgage, your dream vacation is not realistic at least at the moment. Goal setting experts also suggest rating motivation using a 1 to 10 scale. 10 = will do everything necessary to reach the goal. 1 is the goal is not yours and unrealistic. Any rating below 6 is questionable and family vacation plans individual ratings should average to at  least a five. Those with the higher motivation should do most of the work.

T = Time based  =  Vacations are usually planned for specific times: when school is out or parents work allow for planning a vacation time. But time also has other meanings. For example, the further ahead you make reservations, the better you chances of getting what you want at a price you can afford.  Each action step needs a time frame.

But one can also develop a time frame for this using the Family Dream Vacation Exercise as a basis for future family meetings.  First meeting: hearing the dreams; second meeting: exploring various vacation plans and options with each family member  charged to bring at least one  pamphlet or flier  about their dream vacation to the next; third meeting: checking costs; fourth meeting: adjusting plans to meet reality needs; and so on.

MORE PARENT TIPS FOR PLANNING THE FAMILY DREAM VACATION

Tip one: Put it in writing. Following the SMART goal outline describe goal in 250 words.
Tip two: Hold another Family Dream Vacation meeting. Read the goal and then have the family finding a short slogan reflecting the Family’s Dream Vacation. Spend the rest of the meeting making collage about Family’s Dream Vacation. Make sure the slogan is included and post the finished collage the Family Bulletin Board aka as the family refrigerator by some.

Tip three: Meet regularly to report on progress.   Report progress using 1 to 10 scale: 1 no progress, 10 goal met. Rate satisfaction with efforts using on 1 to 10 scale efforts: 1 no effort: 10 above and beyond. This can become part of the agenda for other formal family meetings. 

Tip four: If you do not hold regular family meetings, make doing so one of your New Years Resolution.  Even one family fun event meeting a month, with a bit of business is better than none.

If you have not been holding formal family meetings or have tried them and been unhappy with the results my book How to Hold a Successful Family Meeting is available both in a paper back edition and as an E-book. Click here to order.

 

STAY STRONG

Family meetings are a major tool for helping all in a family stay strong.  They are particularly helpful in preparing children for life in the outside world. A harder life than the world within loving families.  

Emotional Fitness Exercises are another way to stay strong, so, here is my thank you gift if you have just started following me.   It is a free guide to the Daily Twelve Emotional Fitness Exercises. These are easy to learn, easy to practice and helpful to anyone dealing with life’s stresses and every day problems.

As I tell myself a thousand times a day,  stay strong, never weaken, give lots of love to others and to yourself, be grateful, practice kindness, live now, give and seek forgiveness, and always hope  the blessing of the forces beyond our control are with you and those you love.

Katherine

DISCLAIMER: FORGIVE MY GRAMMATICAL ERRORS FOR I HAVE DYSGRAPHIA.  If you need perfect posts, you will not find them here. I have dysgraphia which means that sometimes my sentence structure is not that easy to follow or I make other errors. Still, most people understand me. All of my books are professionally edited, but not all of my blog posts are.  If this troubles you, feel free to read elsewhere.  If you persevere, you are practicing kindness by lifting my spirits for that means you find what I say helpful and that is one of my missions. Kindness always repays those who spread it.

DO NOT HOLD FORMAL FAMILY MEETINGS?

A formal family meeting is a regularly scheduled meeting for the purpose of attending to family business, with rules, an agenda, and a decision-making process.

A meeting is any get together involving two people and at least one with an agenda.  By this definition family meetings are part of family life.  Formal family business meetings are not.  Sad, for a well run formal family meeting reduces parental stress, smooths rule-making and rule-breaking problems, gives everyone a voice, and gets the small stuff like schedules on a fast track.

Moreover, such meetings prepare you and your children for handling life’s other meetings. Finally,  such meetings  teach many important life lessons, including how to deal with not getting you way as well as strategies for getting your way.

Parenting Advice for conducting successful family meetings

The rest of the post is a repeat. Like many this is the end of a busy time and I am pressed.  And I admit, I am promoting my newest book.  But in my defense, I also would like those of you who do not hold family meetings to start. Particularly if your kids are school aged.

Tip one:   Family meetings are a potent and powerful tool for parents, but only if successful and that is not always easily accomplished.  Here are the success tips I developed. Many are drawn from the business world.  Parents are leaders, managers, CEOs; the successful in that group I dub Power Leaders and I have learned much from them.

FMtip sheet

Tip two: The best place to start if you have not been holding regular family meetings is to start with some Family Fun Meetings.   Here is one idea:  have a craft event that re-cycle’s the end of the year greeting cards in one of three ways:  Make gift tags for next year by cutting parts of the cards, punching a hole for the tie.  Have each family member make a scrap-book page out of some of the cards.  Have each family member contribute to a Memory collage that to be or put in a Family Memories Scrap book.

Tip Three: For more tips my  How To Hold Successful Family Meetings is now available in print.

1481187317

If you buy it, please share a review.  And yes, there are lots of other resources about family meetings on the web, some free.  I think mine combines the best of knowledge from clinical and business gurus, but also in-the-trench parents including the many  wonderful parent advocates I worked with.  You know who you are. Thank you all.

STAY STRONG

If you do not hold regular family meetings, make doing so one of your New Years Resolution.  Even one family fun event meeting a month, with a bit of business is better than none.

THE USUAL STAYING STRONG HELP

First, here is my thank you gift if you have just started following me.   It is a free guide to the Daily Twelve Emotional Fitness Exercises. These are easy to learn, easy to practice and helpful to anyone dealing with life’s stresses and every day problems.

My book  Parents Are People Too: An Emotional Fitness Program for parents details all the exercises needed to get and stay emotionally strong.  All my other  books can be found on my  Amazon’s Author Page.

You can also follow me on the When Good Kids Do Bad Things Facebook page. If you go there please take a moment to like it.

Finally, You might find my Emotional Fitness Training’s Pinterest site helpful. Both of my blog posts are pinned there, and I also share people’s information that I think for help you stay strong both as a parent and an individual. Take a peek by clicking here.

As I tell myself a thousand times a day,  do not weaken, give lots of love to others and to yourself, be grateful, practice kindness, live now, give and seek forgiveness, and always hope  the blessing of the forces beyond our control are with you and those you love.

Katherine

DISCLAIMER: FORGIVE MY GRAMMATICAL ERRORS FOR I HAVE DYSGRAPHIA.  If you need perfect posts, you will not find them here. I have dysgraphia which means that sometimes my sentence structure is not that easy to follow or I make other errors. Still, most people understand me. All of my books are professionally edited, but not all of my blog posts are.  If this troubles you, feel free to read elsewhere.  If you persevere, you are practicing kindness by lifting my spirits for that means you find what I say helpful and that is one of my missions. Kindness always repays those who spread it.