Do you know the six rules of safe drinking? Have you taught them to your child? Think that was all you needed to do? Think again.
“My kids made me stop smoking when they were six and seven. Not that I smoked that much. Maybe, three cigarettes a week, if that. I was proud if they saw me lighting up and yelled at me. Didn’t think I’d have to worry about drinking and drugging. How wrong I was.”
You can do all the right things to keep your kids sober, but that doesn’t mean they won’t drink, drug, and get addicted. Addiction comes from a genetic predisposition or from drinking and drinking and drinking, something teens do in cultures that push drinking and rebelling. If you are reading this, you probably live in such a culture or your child is involved in a peer group culture of drinking and drugging. What can you do? Read on.
PARENT ADVICE ABOUT DRINKING AND DRUGGING
Tip one: Learn the Seven Rules of Safe Drinking. Here they are:
Rule one: Indulge only if you can buy legally. Keeps you out of jail.
Rule two: Define a drink or drug dose properly. A drink means twelve ounces of beer; four ounces of wine: two ounces of the hard stuff. Drug dosage only as prescribed for you, or what helps you relax without getting high. Seeking the high is part of the addiction cycle.
Rule three: Indulge no more than once an hour. Chugging or doing shots can kill . A indulging only once an hour also keeps you from doing stupid things – like thinking you can drive or having a fight about something you might normally laugh off or having un-protected sex with someone you just met or just thinking another supersize dessert is not breaking your diet.
Rule four: Indulge no more than three times a day.
Rule five: Lay off indulging at least three days a week. This keeps tolerance from building.
Rule six: Do not mix drinks and drugs — including legal and illegal drugs. Combining drinking with pot can kill as it suppresses the up-chucking instinct when the body cannot safely process any more alcohol.
Rule seven: Don’t indulge and drive or use heavy or dangerous equipment, or do risky things.
Tip two: Observe these rules yourself. If the idea of having to follow these rules up set you, then you are at risk yourself. Educate yourself. Start working to abide by the rules, and if you cannot seek counseling from a drug counselor or start attending AA. You can go to an AA meeting on-line meeting here.
Tip three: Enforce these rules when serving drinks to others.
Tip four: Post these rules where indulgers, including you will see them. Places to post: in the entrance to your wine cellar, on your beer kegs, over your personal bar, where your Waterford wine and highball crystal is kept or favorite sports team beer glasses are lined up; in front of you at your favorite sports bar. Drugging? Near your stash.
Tip five: Living with someone who violates the rules even if you don’t? You also need to get help and support. You need to develop what I call an Added Care Team. Start attending a support group — Alanon on line is a good place start, then find a local face-to-face meeting. When you have found a meeting you trust, add a drug counselor the group trusts to your added care team.
Tip six: Help is available but like many life experiences in some places has been polarized. Hard core 12 Step People will insist there is not such thing as safe use for an addict. They are probably right. However, the hardest thing addicts face is denial. “It ain’t me babe.” The Motivational Interviewing approach is designed to cut through denial and I have found their approach useful.
Moreover, I think it is particularly important to start with this approach when dealing with teens. Parents can do so much, particularly if the surrounding culture is a drinking and drugging one.
Parenting is hard work and contending with a child who is drinking and drugging demands more than good parenting. Hopefully, the above tips and resources will help you and your child survive this hard time.
MORE STAYING STRONG HELP
First, here is my thank you gift if you have just started following me. It is a free quide to the Daily Twelve Emotional Fitness Exercises. http://emotionalfitnesstraining.com/the-daily-dozen-emotional-fitness-exercise/These provide a quick start to stress reduction and feeling management. Each exercise is backed by research, but most importantly all are easy to learn, easy to practice and helpful to anyone dealing with life’s every day problems or mega-stress.
You might find my Emotional Fitness Training®’s Pinterest http://pinterest.com/Emotfit/pins/ site helpful. Both of my blog posts are pinned there, but I also share lots of other information about staying strong both as a parent and as an individual.
As always thank you for following me and for your support. Liking, commenting, and sharing are other ways you can help me and others stay strong. Moreover, you will be practicing kindness one of the Daily 12 and strengthening your emotional fitness.
As I tell myself a thousand times a day, stay strong, give lots of love, be grateful, practice kindness, live now, give and seek forgiveness, and always hope the blessing of the forces beyond our control are with you and those you love.
DISCLAIMER: FORGIVE MY GRAMMATICAL ERRORS FOR I HAVE DYSGRAPHIA. http://www.ncld.org/types-learning-disabilities/dysgraphia/what-is-dysgraphiaIf you need perfect posts, you will not find them here. Dysgraphia is a not well known learning disability and means that sometimes my sentence structure is not that easy to follow or I make other errors. Still, most people understand me. All of my books are professionally edited, but not all of my blog posts are. If this troubles you, feel free to read elsewhere. If you persevere, you are practicing kindness by lifting my spirits for that means you find what I say helpful and that is one of my missions. Kindness always repays those who spread it.