In the march to become who they are kids test with clothes, with risky behavior, with Gotcha Wars, but also with the kids they select as friends. It gets worse when the friend you hate is your child’s “One true forever love.”
What do do? Proceed as if walking on fragile Faberge Eggs. What might be broken by putting your foot down is your relationship with your child. That is one of the overall messages in my survival guide for parents of teens, ‘When Good Kids Hang Out With The Wrong Crowd‘.
PARENT ADVICE ABOUT FRIENDS OR THE WRONG ONE TRUE LOVE
Tip one: Meet and greet and if at all possible learn to love. Minimally, learn to see the need the friends or love fills in your child.
Tip two: Open your home if not your heart.
Tip three: While opening your home, hold to your rules but do so as humorously as possible. “I know I am a just a bit old fashion about some stuff, you are welcome to my home, but my house, my rules.” That said, smile and offer chocolate chip cookies.
Tip four: Never, never, never criticize, Even if an unsavory friend steals from you or that one true love ends up in jail for rape of another. Express sadness that life took someone your child cared about down a bad path.
Tip five: Send pleas for help out into the universe and be patient. Usually, when time passes so does the connection to unworthy friends.
Tip six: Practice lots of self care and self soothing exercises.
Tip ten: Develop strong emotional fitness skills. My book Parents Are People Too, An Emotional Fitness Program for Parents details how to do so. For a quick start practice my Daily Twelve Emotional Fitness Exercises.
Parenting is hard work and contending with a child making all the wrong choices when it comes to love and friendship can eat your heart. Hopefully the above tips and resources will help you and your child survive the stress and in time your child will find friends and a love that you welcome to your home and heart with great joy.
DISCLAIMER: FORGIVE MY GRAMMATICAL ERRORS FOR I HAVE DYSGRAPHIA. If you need perfect posts, you will not find them here. I have dysgraphia which means that sometimes my sentence structure is not that easy to follow or I make other errors. Still, most people understand me. All of my books are professionally edited, but not all of my blog posts are. Thanks for your understanding and reading my work.
As always thank you for following me. If you know someone else who will benefit from my thoughts, forward this to them. Liking, commenting, and sharing are other ways you can help me stay strong and spread some ideas others might find helpful.
As I tell myself a thousand times a day, stay strong, give lots of love, be grateful, live now, have lots of luck.